Dating App Without Money

'Mostly, not being on a dating app has to do with privacy and being happy every day with life as it is. Any moment I haven't met the 'man of my dreams' is a moment to take care of myself, friends, and family, and to do something to improve my own life. It has never felt right to me to cast a wide net and look to bring a person into my life. So rather than looking for someone to date, I practice being happy every day on my own, and it helps me see the incredible people who are already in my network of friends, neighborhood, and community. It helps me love the work I do, build a better home, deepen friendships, and be more creative. I won't put that vital energy into scanning through profiles of people I don't have any contact with. I meet incredible people through friends, while hearing live music, at coffee shops, etc. If you're willing to make eye contact and smile at people, it's sort of like swiping through photos in real life. You instinctively know who you want to talk to, who you want as a friend, and who you are attracted to.'

'I'm in NYC and I'm no longer on dating apps for the simple reason that I don't get any dates out of them. I assume it's because I photograph really poorly or dropped out of college to become an entrepreneur, but I NEVER get matches and never get dates out of it. In my most recent stint on and Bumble earlier this year, I swiped right on maybe 1,500 or so women over the course of weeks without a single match. It's terrible for my self-esteem. I'd generally get one response out of 75 or so messages sent out on OKC. So I stopped.

Meeting women in person is extremely easy. They're 50 percent of the population, after all. I meet them all over the place — at bars, parties, dating events like Social Concierge, etc. It's really as easy as introducing yourself and starting a conversation. If you go into it with the goal of having a fun conversation, there's no pressure. If we're both enjoying the conversation and feeling a connection, I'll ask for her number. I find it's really hard not to have a fun conversation if they're interested in chatting. For what it's worth, I start conversations with everyone, everywhere. Everyone has an interesting story to tell!'

'Mostly, not being on a dating app has to do with privacy and being happy every day with life as it is. Any moment I haven't met the 'man of my dreams' is a moment to take care of myself, friends, and family, and to do something to improve my own life. It has never felt right to me to cast a wide net and look to bring a person into my life. So rather than looking for someone to date, I practice being happy every day on my own, and it helps me see the incredible people who are already in my network of friends, neighborhood, and community. It helps me love the work I do, build a better home, deepen friendships, and be more creative. I won't put that vital energy into scanning through profiles of people I don't have any contact with. I meet incredible people through friends, while hearing live music, at coffee shops, etc. If you're willing to make eye contact and smile at people, it's sort of like swiping through photos in real life. You instinctively know who you want to talk to, who you want as a friend, and who you are attracted to.'

'I'm in NYC and I'm no longer on dating apps for the simple reason that I don't get any dates out of them. I assume it's because I photograph really poorly or dropped out of college to become an entrepreneur, but I NEVER get matches and never get dates out of it. In my most recent stint on and Bumble earlier this year, I swiped right on maybe 1,500 or so women over the course of weeks without a single match. It's terrible for my self-esteem. I'd generally get one response out of 75 or so messages sent out on OKC. So I stopped.

Meeting women in person is extremely easy. They're 50 percent of the population, after all. I meet them all over the place — at bars, parties, dating events like Social Concierge, etc. It's really as easy as introducing yourself and starting a conversation. If you go into it with the goal of having a fun conversation, there's no pressure. If we're both enjoying the conversation and feeling a connection, I'll ask for her number. I find it's really hard not to have a fun conversation if they're interested in chatting. For what it's worth, I start conversations with everyone, everywhere. Everyone has an interesting story to tell!'

'I'm not on dating apps because I write publicly about vulnerable issues like eating disorders, PCOS, and recovery at I Haven't Shaved In Six Weeks, and I would prefer to meet people organically to explain that. I've tried dating apps before without linking my social media or mentioning my blog, but, the truth is, people know how to find you. Plus, I think it's human nature to 'talk' (text) to someone and want to immediately have more info at your fingertips. I don't enjoy feeling as though I need to put my writing — or my story — on defense before meeting someone. Most men were understanding, but it always left me feeling like we were at a disadvantage because my life story is on the Internet and they are not. I didn't feel it gave me the best opportunity to date.

Instead, I meet people loads of ways. I've gone on dates through volunteering for a nonprofit. I've gone on dates through friends of friends. My ex — I met at a friend's wedding. I attend a book club and writing class, and have met people that way. I don't attend Meetups or dating 'mingles.' I just live my life and people come along on planes or trains. In more interesting cases, I've gone on dates a couple times with men who have written to me off my contact page on my blog to thank me for giving them insight into their mother's/sister's/brother's/son's/whomever's eating disorder or addiction recovery — kinda like a You've Got Mail situation. I've hiked with a man and we had emailed back and forth for months prior. There's interesting ways to meet people, I'm confident of that.'

'I tried apps but got burnt out (who doesn't?!). Now, I go to events I'm truly interested in, like comedy shows and book signings, and if I meet someone there, great. If not? At least I was out doing something I like to do! Also, I feel apps are too forced. When you meet someone at one of the above events, for instance, it's natural, and you don't have to do all the back-and-forth that apps require — not to mention, so many people flake or stop messaging anyway!'

'Friends of friends are my go-to. If I don't meet women at a social event I'll naturally attend, like a birthday party, sometimes I'll just flat-out ask male and female friends if they have anyone to introduce me to. You don't know if you don't ask!'